December 25th, 2023 was the last time Princess of Wales, Kate Middleton, was seen in public. American-born Kate Middleton married the English Prince William in 2011. She quickly became the darling of England and America alike as she broke barriers as a foreigner taking up a role in the royal family. Middleton also holds the title as future Queen of England as her husband, Prince William, is next in line.
Middleton was living a lavish life in the public eye, so absolutely no one was anticipating her quite slip into complete privacy. In response to her disappearance, the royal family announced that Middleton had undergone a “planned abdominal surgery” and has taken the last three months to recover. This didn’t initially raise any red flags, until recently when the royal family posted an image on social media displaying Middleton and her three children. Within mere minutes, viewers of the post uncovered that the image was not only heavily edited, but most likely completely fabricated. The world became frantic — where is the lost princess? Where is she hiding? Students at Cannon Falls High School know the answer.
No one would ever anticipate the estranged princess to show up at a rural town in southern Minnesota and apply for a teaching position at the local public high school, but that is exactly what happened. Middleton arrived at CFHS in mid-January, seeking a break from the press and in pursuit of a quiet, mundane life. This is surprising for Middleton since she has been in the public eye since she joined the royal family 13 years ago. “It just all was too much. The traditions, the rumors, the complete lack of privacy,” Middleton explained, “I just wanted to go back to my regular-person roots where no one was watching me all the time. And you know what they say, if you want to feel completely ignored, teach high school.”
Middleton quickly filled a vacancy in the English department and began teaching the rightfully awestruck students. Senior Grace Miller was placed in one of Middleton’s classes at the beginning of second semester, and simply cannot contain her excitement: “It’s so scandalous, a missing princess teaching at my school. And it’s so classy to be learning English from someone who lives in England.” Many students were dumbfounded when they entered their English classes to find the prominent figure behind the teachers desk, but an LED poll revealed that around 50% of CFHS had no idea who she was. “How was I supposed to know she was a princess?” commented Senior Bowen Maki, “It’s not my job to pay attention to England.”
However, word of Middleton’s royal alter-ego has spread through the school following the release of the fabricated photo. Still, CFHS administration urges students not to disclose Middleton’s location for the sake of school security.
