Every morning I take two pills, one for my ADHD and one for my anxiety. Somehow the whole school knows. So from every step I take to every word I say, I’m still the girl with ADHD. I laugh when something’s funny, “did you take your pills?.” I made a funny joke, “did you take your pills?.” My whole life revolves around pills. The people who believe that pills define me continue to intimidate me. Those same people will keep going till they have made a point, when the point to them is that I did not take my pills, in reality I did. When in my defense I was only having fun.

With ADHD you’re not allowed to laugh, be silly, or do anything in some sort of fun manner, you’re only allowed to sit still and do your work, or you’re crazy and you didn’t take your pills . You only listen to what people say. If they say you didn’t take your pills, you didn’t —stop saying you did— you didn’t. Because everyone knows best and if you get mad about it the teacher will be mad that you are “causing problems and being rude.” That’s it. That’s all that you are in another’s eyes. 

I’m a girl with ADHD, I can’t control myself, I’m crazy, I’m annoying, I’m disrespectful , I’m rude, and I’m a bad influence on my peers.

Though all these things are what people are trying to make me and anyone else who struggles with ADHD believe, I know that we are the strongest-minded people ever, we have to fight our needs and wants to be “normal.” I have to put in way more work than anyone else to understand something and to sit still while paying attention. It may come easy to everyone, but not even the pills can keep me completely together. Sadly the pills don’t stop me from being me— they only help me focus.