“I can make a difference”. This is the mindset that 2015 Cannon Falls graduate, Micah Jeppesen, had as she told her personal story at her first fundraiser,  Chili and Chocolate Relationship Recovery, hosted by Hope Coalition on February 23rd. “I didn’t really speak, I just showed my video and thanked all the donators,” Jeppesen stated as she explained her role in the program. “I just want to make sure no one else has to go through what I did.”

Micah Jeppesen is a survivor of an abusive relationship that resulted in not only physical damage such as hair tearing, bruising, and blackouts, but also with devastating mental aftermath. “It started at a grad party of one of my friends,” relives Jeppesen, “ we decided to go back to his house for the night. While driving back he wanted to go back to the party, but I just wanted to go to bed and he grabbed me by my neck and threw me up against the window. I got out of the car and started walking to my friends house, but he drove up to me and forcefully told me to get in the car. I was scared so I got in the back seat which he didn’t like. He grabbed my hair and yanked me into the front seat where he again started to bang my head against the window and choked me until I nearly blacked out. He also tried to break my arm and whenever I tried to get out he pulled my hair to keep me in the car so I lost a lot of my hair. I finally managed to get away and ran into the nearby cornfield. But he chased me down and threw me on the ground. I was beaten again and thrown back into the car. I told him that I lost my purse in the field which I did and if I could go get it and he allowed it. But a little later he came back and beat me up again and, again put me in the car. All the doors were closed this time so I locked the car doors with him still outside, climbed into the driver’s seat and drove home. I called my dad and he was devastated. He called the police after that and they took my boyfriend away.”

People who endure an abusive relationship feel like they’re stuck in the relationship because it is their first “real” relationship and it’s not always just the man. Micah Jeppesen explains that contrary to popular belief, a lot of relationships can consist of physical and mental abuse from the girls, just like the guys. Many aspects of an abusive relationship may not even register with the victim in these situations, making them feel like their situation is normal or okay. An abusive relationship can be seen physically, emotionally, sexually, economically, and psychologically. If your partner physically abuses you or forces you into drugs or alcohol, it is an abusive relationship. If your partner tears you down with name-calling or constant criticizing, it is an abusive relationship. If your partner controls your contact with family, friends or finances by forcing you to pay off debts, it is an abusive relationship. If your partner threatens, intimidates or terrorizes you or loved ones, it is an abusive relationship.

After being in this kind of situation, many don’t know where to turn. “I knew right after that attack I wanted to help others,” comments Jeppesen. “But I had no idea where to start. I went to therapy for a while and also tried kickboxing because exercise can help but it was my dad who found Hope Coalition.”

Hope Coalition is a foundation that started in 1990 and has five different programs in Cannon Falls, Red Wing and part of the Wabasha County that include abuse and violence, sexual assault, domestic violence centers, homelessness, and lack of basic needs. It is maintained by freewill donation, as well as being funded through state grants and private donations. “Micah came to us last summer and we listened to her story,” states Hope Coalition development coordinator, Linda Flanders. “Her story was the basic example of power and control in a relationship so we have been using her story to help others in this situation.” Micah’s story is beginning to spread throughout the state of Minnesota, as she plans to attend many talks from a small seminar in Red Wing this April about child abuse for all ages, to applying for the State Conference in Brainerd on victimization this May. The Chili and Chocolate fundraiser will use the money raised to pay off the last of the nomination for Micah to tell her story to the whole state, and possibly the country. “I’m still a little emotional with some things that remind of that time, but lately I’ve been pretty happy,” says Jeppesen, “And I know it’ll be tough but just have to fight through it.”